Pomegranates. It's pomegranate season and I've never taken advantage of it before. When Ramadan was in the winter season I loved sprinkling my fruit chaat with this fruit but I never considered just shelling out the dark red seeds and eating it by the bowlful. The thought intrigued me so I put in my list of 109 in 2009. I figure one must in their lifetime aspire to eat a bowl of pomegranate if one can. I can't believe I waited this long! I love the sweet crunchy flavor of eating the seeds by the spoonful and even shelling them out is a labor of love.

Salt Rock Lamp. Even before reading about the benefits of salt rock I knew this was no ordinary lamp. First the glow is soothing and surprisingly strong yet gentle, and just placing ones hands on its warmth and closing ones eyes. . . you feel like all your worries for the brief seconds your hands touch the warmth, have all evaporated. They are made in the Himalayas of Pakistan and if you check before you buy, most of the ones for sale are produced via Fair Trade.


My bloggy friends. Y'all. I feel overwhelmed by your kind comments and your genuine joy over my news about getting an agent. Reading your comments seriously put a smile on my face. It was so awesome to hear from some of you who have been reading from way back in the day. I didn't even know you guys stopped by. Thank you SO much for your warm comments, and for still coming by, it felt like a big bear hug from each and every one of you! Sometimes I've thought about stopping my blogging since I'm so infrequent these days but moments like that just make me want to keep going. Thank so much!

Labels: 3bt, blogging

posted by Aisha @ 12:38 AM || 3 comments

I love to write. As a child I wrote with abandon, without fear or insecurities nagging at me. Yet, once I hit college, I stopped writing. I thought about writing a lot, but actually putting pen to paper just didn't happen. Fear, instead, took over. How could I presume to ever see my book in print when there were so many writers out there trying to make it? I began getting books on "how to write" and "get published quick" and reading them cover to cover. I browsed the "Writer's digest guides" and "Writer's Market" and then stuck them back on the shelf. I fancied myself a writer yet I stopped writing altogether. I became a teacher, and then I went to law school. You would be surprised with how many published authors are also lawyers. I think law school is the safe choice for people who love the written word but are afraid to take a risk.

Despite different career paths and different hobbies, the desire to write stayed with me. I wrote about my frustration and then one day, I wrote about how inspiration struck in 2007. Suddenly I saw the girl who wanted me to write about her. Some writers say this happens, you just suddenly see a character and they lead you down their path. I felt like a journalist at first taking in the facts of her life and then slowly more visualization came in and I kept writing. I had to push out my fears of getting published, and failure and just write because writing felt so natural and good and the public recognition of it ceased to matter. My story mattered and even if it only was read by me, it was worth it.

After many revisions, and edits, whole hearted red X's across the white pages, a kind author, family and good friends who agreed to read and felt brave enough to give me honesty, I was done. Being done, it became time once again to face my fears. I had to take this writing that I slaved over for years and finally put it out into the world where people would not cradle it as gently as I had or spare my feelings perhaps as my friends might have as they read it. I wrote about my fear, a lot.

I sat with my manuscript, afraid to send it out into the world for some time. The odds sucked. I would likely get enough rejections to paper the walls of my house. Did I need to feel that pain? I read somewhere 500,000 writers try each year and only a few hundred succeed. Who did I think I was?

After some time in limbo land debating whether to make a healthy bonfire and toss my manuscript in, I decided I had to try. Yes daydreams are comforting because in your dreams you succeed, I knew I had to walk down the road and find if my dream was just an illusion or something that could truly be. So I looked my fear in the eye and I leapt. If I failed, at least I would know to put this dream to rest.

In May, I went to the bookstore and looked up authors who write in my genre and found out that most of them had one agent in common. I looked up the agency, they accepted unsolicited work. But- this is the same agency that represents Amy Tan and Lisa See. I knew my odds were slim to none but what did I have to lose? I sent my submission in on October 16. Then I sent in some to a few other agencies. I had a list of 100 and my plan was to tick them off one by one, and at first as I began getting rejections my heart sank as I pictured crossing of number 100.

And then, I got a request from my dream agency. They wanted to read my full manuscript. And then, just this week I got the e-mail:


So in the most long winded way I know how, this post is to tell you that a dream I've harbored since a child just might be coming true. The Sand.ra Di.jk.stra Literary Agency believes they can sell my book.

The process is far from over. I still have to revise the manuscript once more, it has to be submitted to publishing houses, and someone has to like it enough to buy it, so I still have a ways to go before my book is something you will see in bookstores, but, there is a chance, there is an ever growing flame of hope that my dream will come true.

There once was a time I wrote a lot more on this blog and had a lot more readers. I can't be sure who reads now but I know some of you have been here for a very long time and have been there to support me as I wrote about my fears and hopes about my dream of writing. Thank you to you guys, y'all reading these meager words on the screen and responding and caring went a long way in boosting my confidence.

Labels: writing

posted by Aisha @ 6:52 PM || 28 comments

Just now, updating my book review site, it occurred to me how many books I've read in the past few years. Since writing a book, the reading process has changed for me. Each book I read, whether written by a debut novelist, or a seasoned veteran involved months, if not years, of research, writing and rewriting. It involved agents, editors, publishers, trusted beta readers. I thought about this as I just finished another book, tossed it in my library basket and sat down to review it. I read this book in two days, it took me about ten minutes to review it, and then I look on to my next book. Yet behind each book casually read is so much hard work and hope. A book is a story, but its more than that, within each book is a part of the soul of he who wrote it.

Labels: books, writing

posted by Aisha @ 7:06 PM || 2 comments

Today as I drove home I saw a squirrel in the distance standing on its haunches in the middle of the road. I shrugged. It would move. They always do. George Costanza kindly pointed out that its an unspoken agreement between us and the squirrels and birds. They may wait until the last minute, but they move. Not this squirrel. As I approached I realized this squirrel was going nowhere. I had to swerve to avoid it. Then, I stopped at the stop sign and as I hit the accelerator this squirrel darted in front of my car again! Luckily I missed it again, but then it actually raced with my car! Naturally, a car outruns a squirrel so I beat said squirrel, but I am fairly convinced this rodent had a death wish.

Nuts, acorns, and berries and hopping from tree to tree. No business meetings, no economic downturns or 401Ks. You'd think a squirrel's life is an ideal life, but I tell you, this squirrel had a death wish and it seemed eager for me to grant it. I wish I had contacts with the rodent world, perhaps a hotline (I suggest 1800Nuts) would go tremendously in the way of assisting the depressed squirrel population of my neighborhood. Clearly its a problem which needs addressing.

Labels: humor, life

posted by Aisha @ 1:37 AM || 1 comments

I went to a Joshua Radin concert tonight. I love REM, U2, and other big stars but going to a concert with them involves sitting in the nosebleeds and paying $65 for the privilege of doing so. A lesser known artist means cheap tickets and up close and personal access. He talked to us and told us the stories behind his songs and after the concert we met him and he signed our album!

What moves me most is watching an artist who writes and composes his own music. I'm watching him in the middle of his journey, who knows how far his talent will ultimately take him. To this effect, I particularly loved his song, no envy no fear:

Labels: concert, music

posted by Aisha @ 1:51 AM || 7 comments

In between submitting to agents and working on my next manuscript, I'm still chugging along on my 100 book challenge for my 109 in 2009. I've been very lucky to have had a spate of great books for a while now with each book as good as the last, but now I'm done out of books! Any books you read lately that you think are a must read? Please share, I'd love to request it from my library!

Labels: 100 book challenge, 109 in 2009, books

posted by Aisha @ 10:46 AM || 17 comments

I will now put on my Captain Obvious hat, and tell you I haven't been blogging much lately. In fact, not much this entire year. There are many reasons but the biggest one is when I write I tend to work on my manuscript or other writing projects. I still keep up with my book and movie reviews, and maybe at some point I'll begin updating this site more regularly. This isn't a hiatus, just saying what you already see, that the blogging isn't so regular, and probably won't be for at least the forseeable future.
posted by Aisha @ 10:42 AM || 6 comments

1. Watching the moon change each night before my eyes from nothing, to a sliver, until voila, we see the full round moon casting its moon shadow on our nightly walk. I can't believe I have not watched a lunar cycle in its entirety before.
2. Autumn is here! I love the crisp air and sleeping with the bedroom windows open, the hint of brown in the trees and pulling out the turtlenecks and boots in anticipation of the chilly weather to come.
3. Curb Your Enthusiasm. The HBO show. It's hilarious. Seinfeld times ten. Speaking of Seinfeld, they're reuniting on the show Sunday. Beautiful indeed.

Labels: 3bt

posted by Aisha @ 8:33 PM || 4 comments

On my last blog post, I got the following comment:

WOW! You are so lucky! I wish I was that blessed... you got a husband that supported you through law school... and supports you through the book writing... AND... you live with some guy!! Rock on Girl!

I am going to go ahead and assume this person's intent was not to be sarcastic, or in any way bad intentioned, but this anonymous comment (and of course, they're always anonymous) disturbed me and I feel I must address it.

First, I don't take for granted that K is very supportive of my dreams and I appreciate it because I could not do any of this without his support. I am blessed, agreed. But to say "I wish I was that blessed" makes me cringe. Yes, I have blessings in my life. So do all of you. I also have my share of difficulties and struggles just like all of you. Some I have discussed outright on this blog, and some due to their extremely personal nature, I discuss vaguely. My outlook is a choice. I could bemoan the horrible economy and how difficult it is right now to find a job. I could cry to you about how we're no longer a dual income household and being home not bringing in a paycheck will surely be an adjustment. I could paint the image of my current situation in a very sad and deplorable light if I wanted to, but I don't. I don't because though it does not always come easy, I try to find the good in my life. I take this bad economic time, and the fact that I am burned out from a bad job, as an opportunity to work on my writing dream, instead of whining to you about how unfair life is.

While I do feel blessed, I believe this feeling is not so much as what I have but more so the choice I have made to appreciate my blessings. There are people with more than me who are far less happy, there are people with less than me who are far more happy. It's a choice. There are days I falter, there are days that hurt more than you will know, but overall I strive to maintain a good perspective on my world. With this blog I share with you a part of my life, but by no means does it mean that everything there is to know about my life is listed here. To my commenter, I pray for the same examination of your own life and for your happiness through the ability to choose to see the blessings you already possess.

Labels: blessings

posted by Aisha @ 9:05 PM || 7 comments

If you read my blog when I was in law school you probably noticed I posted a whole lot more than I have been lately in the past year or so. There is a reason. You see, when in law school, while you spend a good deal of time in class, the majority of your time is spent studying, an optional (albeit highly encouraged) activity. To be fair, I studied a great deal but there is a magical thing about sitting down at the breakfast table to study: You suddenly remember the laundry piled up, the kitchen drawer, and you suddenly feel so darn creative. You just want to write and post and share your thoughts with the bloggy universe. Work kind of put a stop to that stream of consciousness blogging since I had to, you know, do my job, and when I got home between working on my novel, cooking, cleaning, reading, catching up with the guy I live with, I just didn't have the energy.

Now my job has ended and I am sitting at the breakfast table ready to work on my novel. The laundry is shaking its condescending little head, the fridge is asking me have you cleaned me this week? In short, I am the horse whisperer, except to kitchen appliances and the like. I am blocking out all those noises and I'm sitting at the kitchen table, ready to begin writing again. Ready to begin the query letter process, and get this book out of my computer and into the wide world of rejection and hopefully success. Why do I share this? Because this means ofcourse, I will be blogging a whole lot more.

Labels: writing

posted by Aisha @ 1:27 PM || 8 comments

1. Today a police car approached a four-way stop sign the same time I did. He went first and I drove behind him. He turned left, and I had to turn left. Then we both turned right. I ended up following him for four miles. I am so grateful I let him go first because I would have been super paranoid had a cop been following my every turn for four miles. I'm a law abiding citizen but a cop trailing my car makes me feel like I'm on the lark with a pack of koala bears stuffed in my trunk.

2. My Arkansas Family. We went to visit K's mamus labor day weekend and I had one of the best hangouts of my life. They are hilarious and I loved the constant back and forth teasing and the genuine warmth and affection that remained ever present in every interaction. Amen, if you're reading, it was so nice to get to know you better. You're an amazing person!

3. Walking with K in the evening and taking in the scent of jasmine in the air while cold wind gently whispers through my hair and cools my skin. In a moment like that it is impossible to feel anything but peace.

Labels: 3bt

posted by Aisha @ 5:07 PM || 5 comments

When I was president of my MSA a young man [let's call him Bobbullah] attended our board meetings with his visions for MSA. Daily Dawah tables! Large fund raising banquets with nasheed bands! Iftaar served daily on campus! Prominent speakers flying in to talk! He presented these ideas with a smug grin as he reclined in his seat with arms folded. One day I turned to him Great ideas! I said, I'm going to put you in charge of these things. His smile vanished. He looked at me confused. I know you're passionate about these ideas so please get to work and organize whoever is interested to help you. You have our approval.

We never saw Bobullah again.

My job ends today, 9-9-09, and I dreamed of this day for a good six months. Sitting in yet another meeting I daydreamed of figuring out the perfect word for the query letter. 090909 felt so far away. I can't believe its here. I can't believe the next time someone asks me what I do, I won't have a ready answer. People tell me to say I'm a writer. But its intimidating to voice this aloud.

Today I feel a bit like Bobullah. Grand schemes, beautiful dreams but now its time to do it. It's frightening to try to actualize your dreams because there are no guarantees. Hard work does not mean you'll succeed, but when I applied for dream job, only 48 hours to go in the application process I wondered if it was worth it when a friend said to me: If you try you're not guaranteed to win, but if you don't try you are guaranteed to lose. And its with this mantra in mind I go forward.

Each day I’m struck by life and how deceptive it is. Each day feels much like the last, lulling us into a false sense of security that nothing will change but before we know it nothing is the same, we just weren’t present to watch the season change. I must remind myself that each day I put off my writing for the next day is a day I won't get back. Each minute leads to the next hour, each hour on each day, and each day on the weeks and months and years to come. Each block, a building block of life, precious time I will never get back. Starting Monday, the new working life of Aisha begins. Not all of this is going to be in my hands but I will do the best with the part of it that is. Let us see what it will bring. I hope it will be good things.

Labels: job, writing

posted by Aisha @ 5:29 PM || 9 comments

The birthplace of the Islamic Empire in Spain sprung from Cordova. The streets are narrow with white washed buildings with flowers draped over the window edges. The city is so well preserved you can stand by the Jewish Quarters and look at the synagogue and feel as though any minute now Maimonides in a dark black robe will walk by, book in hand, lost in thought. It felt bittersweet to see the Grand Mosque of Cordova. I stood inside the red and white arched building and stared at the intricate calligraphic Arabic etched into the green dome and yet I could not ignore the voice in a low baritone echoing through the loud speakers as the priest stood in the center giving mass.

Cordova made me think most of Abdul-Rahman I. For it was him, lost and confused who wandered in exile to Al-Andalus and became the leader of one of the longest standing empires of all time. Despite his great successes, the mosques he built, and the power he wielded, he remained lonely for his people and nostalgic for his home of the middle east, and the date palms, and the sandy desert floor. Chancing upon a palm tree he wrote a poem:


As a left over from the days when Muslims and Jews were exiled or forced to convert, Spanish food remains filled with pork of all variety. I've read converts were tested by being observed at how they ate the pork filled products. Did they shudder, or turn pale? If so surely they were lying about conversion and were either kicked out or killed. Due to the lack of edible food K and I wandered the streets one evening in Cordova looking for a gyro stand to eat from. At last, around 10pm, we came across one, Kebob Cafe. Looking up from the menu we were startled to see two Pakistanis behind the counter, their foreheads dripping with sweat, white aprons tied around their waists, staring back at us.

We sat down to eat and one of them, Ahmed, brought us our food. He spoke Punjabi, he told us he was from Lahore. His eyes lit up as he wiped his forehead and shared about his family back home. Do you like it here? I asked him. His expression changed and he looked down at the floor, a small smile on his lips but his eyes now unreadable. It doesn't matter if I like it or not. I have to feed my family and they need money. Working here, I can make money. I don't think too much about what I like or don't like. I hope one day I will be able to go back home.

I felt struck by the universality of Abdul-Rahman's longing. Centuries later Ahmed toils in an airless shop selling gyros to tourists. His longing is real and cuts through this European city filled with Masjids and memories of the past created by a man who too felt the cutting edge of loneliness. These men lived centuries apart in very different circumstances but both arrived in this same city due to a need to survive. I hope unlike Abdul Rahman, who died without ever seeing his home again, that one day Ahmed will be able to return home.

Labels: Spain, travel

posted by Aisha @ 3:03 PM || 10 comments

1. Freshly mowed grass. Walking downtown I stopped for a moment startled by this familiar scent transporting me to my childhood of watching our father mow the lawn, the piles of cut grass ready for us to herd into piles to jump into. Florida's version of autumn leaves.
2. Walking out of a chilly office building and thawing out under the warm summer sun. Maybe its the vitamin D my skin absorbs as my chilly hands and face thaw under the sun, but this soothing feeling is one of the things I look forward to as I leave a day's work.
3. Home grown tomatoes. Two of our friends are in Australia at the moment and we check on their house from time to time and also have the pleasure of plucking fresh cherry and roma tomatoes from the vines in their backyard. The taste of home grown tomatoes makes you realize how watery and flavorless grocery store tomatoes truly are. Next summer, I too will have my own vines of this sweet fruit.

Labels: 3bt

posted by Aisha @ 6:47 PM || 4 comments

When it comes to gift giving my parents are more of the give cash because then it can be used for something they want camp. As I grew up in that household, for the most part, when gifting I give cash or gift cards. No one hates cash as far as I know, and I don't have to wrack my head for the perfect gift. But the irony comes in that as much as I give out cash and gift cards, when I get gift cards I hardly ever spend them (note #52 on my 109 in 2009 is to spend a gift card, and its AUGUST and I have yet to do it!) and when I get cash its not like I use it to get my nails did or something fun and giftie. I usually just save it and buy a soda or pay for gas. Yesterday I checked the mail and there was a gift for my upcoming birthday and I got so excited. I wondered would I be this excited if it was cash?

The thing is I love giving gifts and if you've been reading long enough you know its a thing I don't take lightly. I'm getting ready to give a gift to someone near and dear to my heart. I have this great idea for a gift that would be part handmade and part professionally personalized. It would cost a good amount of money (in the $100+ range) when all is said and done. While I feel so excited to give the gift the practical side of me is considering, is the cash equivalent better?

My question is two fold (1) what do you generally prefer receiving? Bling or a thing when it comes to gifts? (2) If you were to give advice on my specific dilemma regarding this friend, what would you advise? Your advice is much appreciated!

Labels: advice, gifts

posted by Aisha @ 12:12 PM || 12 comments